Counselling Central

Coercion is often defined as the act of changing a person’s behaviour, even when they don’t wish to do so. How do we use coercive methods on a day to day basis? How many times have you coerced your children into doing something like finishing their dinner, or playing nicely? Have you ever coerced a friend into doing something for you? Watch the news and you might see countries coercing their people into behaving in a certain way.

So how does it work? Most coercive methods are based on threats and/or bribery. Both methods use a form of extrinsic motivation which says “if you do this, then you will get that”. Threats may involve physical or psychological attack on the individual being coerced, or the removal of access to a certain desired resource(s).

Why do we sometimes allow ourselves to be coerced? In some cases there may be a reward involved for behaving in a certain way, but in most cases the threats or bribery will involve implied damage to our social status. We will often allow ourselves to be coerced rather than risk rejection from a social group, or face public embarrassment. Being part of a social group, or having a good social standing, is instinctively seen as imperative to our survival. In the early days of the human race it certainly would have been.

So how can we defend ourselves against coercion? There are four basic types of defense:

Stonewall: Say, and continue to say, “no” during the attempted coercion.

Identity separation: Refuse on the basis that it goes against your principles and values – your moral code.

Justification: Outline what you believe will be the negative effect of complying, and then say you won’t comply.

Negotiation: Make counter offers that allow both parties to achieve their goal(s).

According to a study published in the British Journal of Psychology, single women who are looking for a long term relationship show a preference for feminine looking men.

449 heterosexual women participated in the research carried out at the University of Aberdeen. They were presented with a series of pictures of men’s faces which had been altered to look either feminine (high arched eyebrows, small jaw lines and large eyes) or masculine (pronounced brow ridges and jaw lines).

Dr Ben Jones said: “We found that a preference for eye contact – signalling social interest – was very sensitive to the type of judgement we asked the women to make. Preferences for direct eye contact from feminine looking men were strongest when we asked the women how the men would rate as a partner. We know from previous research that women perceive feminine looking men as honest, kind and even as good parents. So it makes sense that women find attention from these men attractive when they are thinking about a long term partner.” 

Do you agree with this research? What do women find attractive about masculine looking men if not for long term relationships??

False Memory Syndrome (FMS) is an expression that was first used in the early nineties. It was coined by the False Memory Syndrome Foundation (FMSF) to describe adults who mistakenly remember being abused in childhood. The FMSF believe that when we are sufficiently motivated, we can change what we remember – sometimes referred to as ’imagination inflation’. Their theory has caused controversy ever since its introduction.

Several Psychologists (such as Freud and Scheflin) agree that it is possible for memories to be repressed by the conscious mind, particularly after a traumatic event. The FMSF believe that certain therapies, which they refer to as ‘recovered memory therapies’ (RMT), such as hypnotherapy, psychotherapy and self help media, can influence adults to falsely remember repressed memories – particularly when they are motivated to do so.

In the United States there have been several high profile malpractise cases in recent years. Adults have sued a family member after recovering memories of abuse whilst in therapy, only for the family member to file a lawsuit against the therapist for encouraging false memories.

It is worth noting that while FMS has been linked to childhood abuse, alien abduction cases and past life experiences, it is a hypothetical construct that has never been empirically proven.