Recent studies carried out by the Royal Free Hospital and University College Medical School in London found that women are more likely to be stalked than men. After further studies involving 50 stalkers the research also discovered that women are more likely to be stalked and attacked by a former partner. There are three categories of stalker:
Intimate partner stalkers: often described as the person who can’t or won’t let go of a former partner. Although society views such people with a certain amount of sympathy, they are in fact trying to carry on the controlling behaviour they enjoyed in the relationship. No amount of ‘trying to let them down gently’ will stop the stalking, it will only remind them of the control they have lost and encourage them to continue. If they can’t have your love they will settle for your anger – they want a response from you.
Vengeful stalker: will feel angry at politicians, ex-bosses or ex-partners. Their perception is that they have been let down badly, and as a consequence they want revenge. To highlight the lengths that they are prepared to go to, disgruntled ex-employees may target former colleagues, bosses or indeed the entire company.
Delusional stalker: believe the relationship isn’t over and the victim is still in love with them. The people who fall in to this category are likely to be unmarried and socially immature loners. They quite often have a poor sense of their own identity and are unable to sustain intimate relationships. Celebrity stalkers fall into this category.
The new category of stalker, who also falls within the categories above, is the cyber-stalker. The Internet has given stalkers new opportunities (hence the name), meaning they can track and trace individuals from the comfort of their own homes.
An alarming statistic recently published states that one in every twelve women, and one in every forty-five men, will be stalked in their lifetime. But why is this the case? The simple fact is human beings have not found healthy ways to just stop feeling. Some people even resort to drug and alcohol misuse which only escalates feelings of low self esteem and anger.
Psychologists have also identified a condition called ‘false stalking syndrome’, which is almost exclusively associated with women. Women with this condition are typically dramatic, sexually provocative, live chaotic lives, suffer repeated relationship failures, have financial problems and very dysfunctional family backgrounds. Women in this category will often take out restraining orders against unsuspecting family members, colleagues or friends and then visit them at work or in their communities.
So what should you do to reduce the risk of being stalked? If you end a relationship don’t give mixed messages. It’s over. Agree to a period of ‘no contact’ between you and stick to it. Don’t talk to mutual friends about your ex-partner. Avoid going to places that your ex may go to for at least one month. Don’t respond to any text, email or phone messages from your ex, even the ones that appear to be friendly. Don’t start a relationship with anyone they know. If you are worried that things are escalating, and/or you fear for your safety, contact your local police.
This is pretty scary but thanks for sharing out the news.
That is some inspirational stuff. Never knew that opinions could be this varied. Thanks for all the enthusiasm to offer such helpful information here.
I cannot wait to read more of this fantatic topic. So much of it Ive never even thought of. You sure did put a new twist on something that Ive heard so much about. I dont believe Ive actually read anything that does this subject as good justice as you just did.
great blog 9/10, bookmarked
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